Friday, September 21, 2007
Casinos and Governors
As the gubernatorial election in Kentucky approaches, the airwaves have been inundated with lots and lots of obnoxious commercials. The focal point of our election has become casino gambling. The Democratic challenger and current poll leader by almost 20 points(pick any poll you want, seriously), Steve Beshear, has said that he will allow a referendum to be put forth in order to allow the people of Kentucky to make the decision. Our current governor, Ernie Fletcher, both disagrees and misunderstands, as evidenced by his stupid commercial. Here it is. Please watch before reading further. Now after seeing that, and the tremendous logical chain of events that most certainly would have lead to her death, I feel compelled to share my gambling story. I had a harrowing 4 hour wait in the den of sin that is Amsterdam. I was wondering around aimlessly when suddenly a beacon of light caught my weary eyes. It was a flashing advertisement for the Holland Casino in the airport! The people in it were so happy and having so much fun, all the while waiting for their flight. "Amazing," I thought innocently to myself. Suddenly, two large, burly, and most assuredly evil casino employees emerged from a pit that suddenly arose from the depths of hell. The grabbed me and forced me into the casino and forced me to play. I had no say in the matter, they even took the money out of my wallet! I chose..eerrr was forced to play blackjack. I won some hands and lost some. After losing about 50 euros, i felt a twinge in my brain. "A blood clot, could it be?!", I thought to myself. Alas I did not listen and continued to play. I continued to lose and the twinge in my brain got stronger. It was exacerbated by the evil dealer laughing and wishing me better luck all the whilst flashing his horrid fangs and trying to conceal the horns that protruded out from his head with a bad comb over. Not to mention he was speaking Dutch, which is grating to the ears of a German speaking student who was being forced to play. Nevertheless, upon losing 100 euros, the blood clot in my head got stuck and I had an aneurysm. I passed out and almost died! All because of the casino, and not my own personal choices. Thankfully, governor Fletcher descended from the sky and saved me from the evil casino. Granted this story may not be true, but my point is that casinos are what you make of them and I think it's a perfectly good idea to let the people decide.